Guilty

Why am I so burdened with guilt?

I am sitting at work writing this.  So I feel guilty.  Even though I put my “on break” sign up and seldom do I take my two 15 minute breaks a day.  But, alas, today I am.  Just because I wanted to.  I didn’t need a break.  I just wanted to do something else.  That may sound contradictory but it is not.

I’m not even using my work computer.  I am using my tried and true and trusted little netbook.  Yes, the very same one that traveled upon my back all over Ireland.   By car, by ferry, by bike, by foot, this little guy went every where with me.

Yes, I know some of you miss my Ireland blogs.  I could take a job as a travel writer.  I travel, and write while I travel.  I will post while I travel.  But I have to get paid to do that.  I think that’s fair.  If I am traveling and working hard at my blogging posts I should get paid for it.  Regardless of how much fun I am having.

But I would feel guilty about leaving home, the kids, the grand babies, the responsibilities-to travel.  And write.  And enjoy it.   But wait, if I was feeling guilty while I was doing it then it would not be total enjoyment.   So I will consider it if you still want me to do it.

I don’t mind my job now.  I do like to be busy.  But when I am busy that means someone else is having a bad day, or life.  So I feel guilty about being productive and getting things done.

Criminy.

I could keep writing about feeling guilty.  But I am at work and even though I have only taken 8 minutes of my break…. I can’t handle the pressure.

And by the way, when I write, or say, guilty, often enough it does not sound like a word.