Sometimes

Sometimes I pray.  I know I’m heard.  I just don’t always  know the answers to my prayers.

 Fortunately, and far too late in life,

I realized that in addition to prayers full of questions and prayers full of requests,

I need to fill my prayers with thanks.

Sometimes I need to remember that what I have I will not always need.

 Structures don’t guide me.  Structures don’t protect me.

They are sometimes temporary shelter.   They may protect some things.

 But never where my heart lies.

Sometimes I think of my temporary time.  The time that others had.   And time they no longer need.

There will be a time when my time here is gone along the way.   The briefest of impact.

Sometimes I know I will be someone’s past.

Sometimes I ponder the devotion of others.  Lives lived hard.

Lives lived building, protecting and sacrificing.

 And sometimes I wonder why I couldn’t be so strong.

And devoted.

Sometimes I think of the directions I’ve reached.

Where I’ve branched out in my life.

And where I have failed to grow.

Sometimes I think of the core of me, and the reach I’ve yet to grow.

Sometimes I see something that stops my musings.

Stops my ponders.

Sometimes I realize that I know nothing yet, that I hope to know.

Sometimes I just accept that there is more.

More than I can appreciate.

Sometimes I think of the road I’m on, not knowing where it  leads me.

 Grateful at times for the not knowing.

Fearful at times of the unknown.

Sometimes I find myself reaching.

 Not knowing what for.

 Other times I reach, and grasp in desperation,

things I need to let go.

Sometimes I need to remind myself that some promises are kept.

Some promises are forever.

Some promises I need not doubt.