The Most Crucial Block In Our Children’s Foundation

What your child’s eyes see

Is absorbed in to his brain.

What your child’s ears hear

Is  absorbed in to her brain.

What you don’t do

They remember.

What you do

They remember.

And they model.

*
*

I’m not a sociologist or scientist or psychologist.  But… if we fill our children’s world with entertainment that weighs heavy with violence and we watch it with them aren’t we programming them to enjoy violence?   If we fill our children’s world with songs of sex, and violence and abuse, aren’t we programming them to accept it?   If we fill our children’s world with lowered expectations and excuses-aren’t we going to get exactly what we are asking for.

I will never regret singing “The Barney Song” with my children.  Or watching Sesame Street and Little House On The Prairie with my children.  I will never regret reading them Fraggle Rock.   I will never regret holding off to get cable and then locking out MTV and other channels when I did get cable.  I will never regret my children working to earn money.  I will never regret expecting them to do their own work in school.  I will never regret them trying to impress me and make me proud.  I will never regret holding them accountable for when they were wrong.  I will never regret telling them I was sorry when I was wrong.  I will never regret telling them no when I meant no.  I will never regret calling their friends parents when I knew something that the other parents should know.

I will never, ever, regret parenting my children.

Parenting, the most crucial block in our children’s foundation.

34 thoughts on “The Most Crucial Block In Our Children’s Foundation

  1. Hurrah …. totally agree, it’s down to the parents – a lot of parents leave it up to the school to give a solid foundation or platform to/for the kids. That is what is fundamentally wrong with today. We all blame the society- but we forget that we are the society. But today are we too busy making money .. to busy spending them … same over here, so scary.

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    • Very well said Viveka! I feel so sorry for teachers. They are demanded more and more of. I don’t know why or when parenting of our children started leaving the home and being placed on the shoulders of everyone else. Yes, it “takes a village”. But by golly it better start in the home!!!!

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      • To be a parent is the most diffecult job in the world – but still it comes with getting children – but I think children are getting in the way for careers too. I feel sometimes so bad for kids, when nobody seems to have time for them,

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        • It’s heartbreaking to see so many things mean so much more than the child. I understand people choosing not to have children. And I admire people for making that choice when they know what they want. But when someone does have children, then they don’t take the time with them…. heartbreaking.

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          • It’s possible biggest responsibility to decide to make babies. *smile … there are so many unwanted babies out there … and they are the ones that get the tough choice. I decide very early that children was nothing for me … I know today that my own childhood has an big impact on that … I was so lonely as a child and no child should feel alone.

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  2. I always seem to forget that… It would seem best, then, that I stop burning rubber in my Mustang and stop throwing my cigar butts in the flower bed, huh… Thanks, Chatter Master!

    But indeed… And to go one step further, our movie and sports idols need to stop doing drugs or hurting people…or cheating even.

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    • Move and sports “idols” is part of the problem. Why do we pay homage to someone who hits, kicks or dribbles a ball more than we do to someone who finds cures, does kind and charitable deeds, or works very hard to provide our own personal home with love, food, and teachings?

      I understand appreciating someone who entertains us. Then we say thank you.

      But we should be in awe of the good things that are happening.

      (And yes….no more cigar butts!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

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  3. Ditto. You are a very wisw woman. I will never regret standing my ground with my kids and having them be mad at me about it. They tell me now it is the reason that they love about me most.

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  4. I agree with almost everything you said her. Almost.

    Not everything said was appropriate. No. One thing was bad. Very bad.

    That thing …

    The one thing I super disagree with. TOTALLY disagree with.

    Is …

    That feckin Barney song. To this day it drives me crazy. I had to listen/sing that more often that I care to remember. (Is it bad that I think he plagerized the tune from “This old man”?)

    *smirkles*

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  5. It is great to see someone’s perspective who’s been through it, analyzed it and shared what the successes were as a parent. Because I love how your mind works and the ability you have to state things that are important without making it seem preachy I think you could be of great service to parents. For instance, I am struggling with a friendship my daughter has. I don’t approve of how the family is parenting and it doesn’t line up with our values. I have not forbid my daughter from playing with this girl but I do not allow her to go to this friend’s house. I really don’t know what the right thing is to do?

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    • You are very kind in your comments. And I’ve been where you are. I would not forbid my children from playing with other children. And there were times I did not allow my children to go to other’s homes. Was it right? I don’t know. When it came to things like this there was no one who could really tell me if it was right or wrong. I think you have to trust your decision, based on the knowledge you have. Every decision you make is founded in love and protection of your child. You are the only ones who will do so, so diligently. I’m certainly far from a parenting expert.

      Once, if you don’t mind me sharing. One stepdaughter came home from school very upset for a schoolmate. Others were making fun of her. These girls were 10 or 11 years old. She had a horrible body odor so others made fun of her. My stepdaughter wanted to go spend the night, at the other girls invitation. I know “of” the family. Knew they’re life style (hygiene, personal care, home care) did not come close to what I wanted my children living in. I knew of nothing bad about these folks other than their living conditions. But my stepdaughter did not want to hurt her feelings, and liked the little girl. I let her spend the night. When she returned home, she came in and sat down and cried. She said now she knows why the little girl smells. And the little girl doesn’t even realize she did smell. Because the home life was physically filthy. My stepdaughter had to take a shower. She saw, in her own very young eyes, that the little girl didn’t know the difference, and didn’t even realize she ‘smelled’ because it was normal for her. I was very proud of her for that. It was things like that, that helped me learn when the kids were absorbing our values, and taking them with her. She remained a loyal, kind, and supportive friend to that little girl.

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      • What an amazing example! See, now this is the stuff I’m talking about! This really brings things to clarity for me. As parents we don’t have road maps that show us if a certain path we take will bring us to our intended destination but knowing what other parents have done and what their outcomes produced helps tremendously! Thank you so much Colleen!

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        • 🙂 You’re welcome. And you’re right. There are NO road maps. There ARE, however, handbooks. And I hear you say WHAT? NO ONE TOLD ME THIS! 😉 When my kids would argue with me and I would give them a final answer, they would CONTINUE to argue. I would tell them “it’s in the mom handbook”. They would NOT believe me and said there was no such thing. They said they had never seen it. I told them “you aren’t a mom now are you?”

          So when they each became pregnant for the first time, they got a “Mom Handbook” with advise and stories written for them from many many moms. 🙂

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  6. I thought it was Love 🙂 but yes, I agree with this, parents and parenting are the foundation to a child’s successful growth into a healthy adult. I’ve read some of the previous comments and I also agree that school teachers (and other groups in society) are taking on the roles that parents should have. I remember watching on BBC how the British PM answered his – I forgot what they’re called, Peers?, after that looting and violence against stores and that interview with the mother who’s children had not joined in the violence. Even here in my part of the world where family ties and parental controls are supposedly much tighter, more and more of the parents’ role and responsibilities are being passed on to schools, religious organizations and what-have-you’s.

    The Bible is very clear about the role of parents in raising their children to be loving and responsible adults. Our present times are a clear sign how confused many parents have become.

    A good eye-opener, this post.

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    • I know what you mean. And as parents, I think it is up to us to retain those controls. Why do we, or would we, expect the schools to be nurse/counselor/morals instiller/etc. They are there to teach. And though I believe in our communities being supportive of positive influence on our children, it’s “US” who make up the community! Thanks for the feedback. 🙂

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