You Made Me Feel Better

I don’t normally get a serious reaction when someone I don’t know passes away.  I may be saddened about the loss to family and friends but it seldom, if ever, felt personal.

It’s been less than an hour since I learned that Robin Williams has died.

And I am sad.  Personally sad.

I never met him.  But I shared a very personal memory with him.  He, of course, never even knew about this.  Many years ago I lay in a hospital bed.  I was a brand new mom.  My first baby only two months old.  I had just had the first surgery of my life.  I wasn’t with my baby.  I was alone in a hospital bed watching the news of impending war.  I was scared witless.  What in the world had I ever done by bringing a baby in to this world.  I was actually crying watching the news.  It could have been hormones, being separated from my baby, being alone, being scared.  Combination of all things.

I changed the channel and an awards show was on.  And he was there.  I started laughing through my tears.  And I felt all right.  It’s a silly-ish moment in the grand scheme of life.  But it was a very emotional one for me.  I adored him before.  But that night I loved him and have ever since.

I’m sure the stories will abound about him.   I have nothing grand or brilliant or astonishing to say.

I just loved him.  I loved him for not being perfect.  I loved him for making me laugh.  I loved him for making me cry when he surprised me with his drama skills.

I loved the familiarity of him in the world.  He didn’t seem all that different than me.  Or those around me.

My sympathies to his family and friends.   And to any one who he made laugh who is  just as saddened by his passing as I am.  I hope that where he is now he is feeling a tremendous amount of love and warmth.   And thanks.   You made me feel better Mr. Robin Williams.   I loved that about you.  I hope you are at peace.   I hope you feel the joy you spread and the sadness at your leaving.

RIP and God Speed to a world where laughing will increase ten fold because of your presence.  And where I hope you receive as much joy as what you created here.  It should come back to you.

I’m pretty sure your path from here is lined with the light of billions of laughs and well wishes for your eternal soul.