What Does That Feel Like

I sometimes forget that there are people who are utterly alone.

And I mean completely, totally, alone.

And it shocks me to the core.

By choice or by circumstance

They exist

Alone

In a world

Of

Seven Billion.

Billion.

What does that feel like.

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28 thoughts on “What Does That Feel Like

  1. Seven billion is a lot of people! To be completely alone among a world of 7 billion people has to be someone’s choice, I think.

    • Priceless I would agree in some situations I’ve come across, it is choice. But the saddest situations I’ve come across…it’s by circumstance. Aging. Family and friends dying. Mental illness. So many different factors. It’s heart breaking. 😦

      • Yes, that is true. When people have any of these people tend to stay away from them. My one family member is much like that. No one wants to be around her. But its her choice to be the way she is.

  2. Far too many adult children have chosen to warehouse their aged and incapacitated parents in nursing homes. Even at the best facilities with delightful programs cannot alleviate the feeling that the old people feel alone and abandoned. I hope I don’t face that. I’d rather die than be alone or be a burden on my children. It is true that the medical and physical needs of an aged parent may require being warehoused. It’s and ugly situation for adult child and aged parent. At 65 now, this kind of future is very disturbing. I suppose I must accept it. That’s they way it is.

    • It is a sad thing to contemplate Carl. I will say, in my years of doing what I do I have seen many senior adults go from appalling living situations. Some of them were utterly alone, as I referenced. And some were actually in the midst of others who should have been caring for them. THey would go to a nursing facility and the quality of their lives improved tremendously. I have had the great fortune of seeing the changes occurring in some facilities. And the mind set changing for care. I encourage families to remember that a nursing home is there to provide hands on care that a few hands who are still working full time, or may be ailing themselves, cannot provide for another. Take advantage of what a nursing home can do. IF it is needed. And remind them that WHERE the aged family member lives does NOT change the fact of that person’s role in a family. I’ve seen folks in nursing homes abandoned, as you say, who feel abandoned. And I’ve seen some abandoned….and go there and for the first time in years (decades) a kind hand holds their hand. Brushes their hair. Speaks gentle words to them.

      The older I get. The more I worry Carl. Because what we see that worries us about the aging…..is going to be ours one day.

  3. The thought of being abandoned, on purpose gives me chills. That someone could something like that to family is despicable. And then, no visits. Breaks my heart to think of it. ❤

  4. It is sad Colleen. We’ve all felt alone at one time or another, but to always be alone…
    Diana xo

  5. reocochran says:

    I cannot imagine or fathom this. I am like you, “shocked to the core.” Makes you think and wonder about the lives led this way (accidentally or on purpose) , Colleen.

    • I find out some of their stories…..heart breaking…..things out of any of our control. Death. Small families. Friends are gone or in the same situation they are. Or, by choice, hurt and angry by life. Whatever the reason, it’s hard to see, when I see it.

      • reocochran says:

        It would be very hard to listen and keep this off your mind, once you leave work. I ‘carried’ stories around sometimes too long, but they needed to be cared about, even in my thoughts and prayers.
        I am off to the eye surgeon for my 6 month check up. I hope he will write a ‘better’ letter for escaping the dreaded heavy bulk duties at work. My optometrist wrote such a great letter until the last sentence saying maybe changing from contacts to glasses I might be able to judge distances better and be able to drive a double pallet-rider. Oh well, just hoping no more surgery for at least a couple more years!

        Smiles and have a fantastic day, Colleen. It is so sunny even if it is not warm, sunshine warms my heart and yours, too. I know you are a good person from the way you write about the clients and cases you deal with, Colleen. Hugs, Robin

        • Good luck with the eye surgeon Robin!

          Thank you for the nice words. The stories are often difficult to hear. They need processed for sure. And that is not an easy process (redundant?). But ….it has to be done.

          I saw the sun a few times. Hoping to see it a little more! 🙂

  6. niaaeryn says:

    A very sad thought.

  7. markbialczak says:

    It feels like they want it to feel like for many, MBC. For others, I imagine, it tears them up. Sadness with each moment.

  8. Jim McKeever says:

    Colleen … a couple of weekends ago, my girlfriend and I went for a walk — it was a rare sunny, pleasant Sunday afternoon. We walked, holding hands, alongside the pond in the park near our house. We walked past an older gentleman sitting on a bench, alone. We said hello to him and he returned the greeting. But his face struck me. He looked sad. A minute or so later, we saw him get up and walk — trudge, rather — to his car. It was a gut-punch. I don’t think he was alone by choice. And I hate to think that seeing us holding hands just devastated him. Damn …

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