My promise to who I am.
Regardless of how well people think they know me there are some things that I want to make sure are understood about me. If you ever need to come in to my home and make decisions for me because that’s what needs done I would appreciate it if you know these things and respect them.
I promise that I primarily prefer people to be happy. I understand sadness and moodiness. But my promise to myself is to keep those feelings in check. Limit their stay. And wallow in joy.
I promise that I am not vain. But I am particular about being clean. I don’t mind getting dirty as long as I can get clean as soon as I’m done with the need to be dirty. I like my hair not too short but short enough to be messy spiky. I prefer to not stink. Though I don’t need to be all perfumey. I like my clothes to fit. But be comfortable. As it is right now my outfit of choice is bike shorts and extra large nylon type shirts. I prefer barefoot.
I promise that I love music. I will sway my hands in the air as I ride my bike on a trainer as I sing along with a song. Or I fold my hands over my heart if I am moved by emotion and faithful music. I promise I’ll try to listen to anything. But if I can’t sing to it it probably won’t need to be played a second time for me.
I promise when I sing songs I will get the lyrics wrong.
I promise I will always
be afraid of not like snakes. I promise I find no joy in being teased about this.
I promise that I love quiet, as much as I love music. There’s a balance. Sadly, only I know it.
I promise that I love people. I admire people. I empathize with people. I hurt for people. I celebrate for people. But I am not always at ease with people.
I promise that I never want someone else to hurt- for me to find joy or happiness. That is an impossibility.
I promise that there are things I can live without. But there are people who without them I could not exist.
I promise that I will always love chocolate. Dark chocolate is my favorite.
I promise that I will always think there is something I should be doing differently to be a better person.
I promise that the above statement is a completely healthy way to want to live.
I promise that even in the hardest moments of my life I will find, eventually and maybe hidden, joy in my heart.
I promise that though I have mostly removed many things from my diet I will always, stress always, love: BBQ ribs; deep fried buckeyes, deep fried almost anything; meatloaf; hot white bread with real butter; cake; full fat ice cream; cheeseburgers; it’s probably safe to say pretty much all foods that are bad for you. I promise the only reason I restrict them is because I want to live as long as possible.
I promise I am not perfect.
I promise you that there are those among you that I admire every single day of my life.
I promise that I love to laugh.
I promise that I love to pray.
I promise that I love to listen to other’s life stories.
I promise that I could write hundreds more sentences that start with “I promise”.
But my promises are for my children. My friends. My family. So I feel I can never make enough of them. And I want to work hard to stay true to my promise.
I promise to be who I am for as long as I can be.
I promise to love you. It’s who I am.
I write this in honor of all of the people I see on nearly a daily basis who have no one left to hold them to their promise of themselves.